Osexigt år my arse!
Mitt kärleksastro ser inte så lovande ut. Tur att jag bara tror på personlighetsprofiler, och inte horoskop. Dessutom är jag skytte i månen så det kanske fixar sig ändå. I 2009 vill jag få ett jobb i England, träffa en karl jag trivs med, och göra framsteg på utbildningsfronten. Det räcker för tillfället, men om jag har karl och jobb i 2010 så hoppas jag på att få bli mamma. Men den dagen, den sorgen; just nu koncentrerar jag mig på veckan som kommer. Mycket kan hända på 7 dagar. Vad vill ni med 2009?
OXEN - Juni blir härligt het och sexig
Det finns en risk att du snubblar över dina egna krav. Du vill utvecklas och förbättra ditt liv på många sätt, men det går trögt. Det kostar dessutom massor av energi och en följd av detta är att du får för lite tid och ork över för kärleken.
Våren blir ljummen. Det ljusnar lite i april, bland annat tack vare ett roligt förslag som du får 29/4. Men först i juni tar kärlekslivet fart och sexlivet återfår sin glöd. 19/6 är en ovanligt sexig dag mitt i en het och härlig månad. När juni har passerat finns det en viss risk att du ramlar tillbaka i praktiska, tråkiga prioriteringar. Mycket blir gjort, du kanske flyttar till exempel, men kärlek och känslor får vänta. En flirt i augusti piggar upp och 6/10 ut-lovar erotisk hetta, men det är långt mellan ljuspunkterna.Mot slutet av året börjar du känna dig en smula nöjd, du slappnar av mer och känner att den långa uppförsbacken äntligen är till ända. En rolig överraskning 27/12 öppnar för att nästa år får en bra start.
Heta tecken: Väduren, Skorpionen
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MÅNEN I SKYTTEN (Ann Henning: Modern astrologi)
Är ostadig och slarvig men samtidigt optimistisk och positiv. Du byter ofta bostad och blir rastlös om du stannar alltför länge på samma plats. Du är odefinierat idealistisk och ditt omdöme är mycket gott. Din mor var troligen filosofiskt lagd men inte särskilt varm. Själv är du en stimulerande och hjärtevärmande kamrat men inte så lätt att leva ihop med eftersom du kräver full personlig frihet och sällan anstränger dig för att ordna upp hushåll eller ekonomi. Din lättsinniga inställning till pengar gör att du är ständigt skuldsatt.
MÅNEN I SKYTTEN (Palrinieri & Rader: Astrologi i praktiken)
Optimism, utåtvändhet och ett lyckligt sällskapsliv. Starkt intresse för resor.
I ett manligt horoskop: benägenhet att ha många kortlivade förbindelser. Utländska kvinnor.
I ett kvinnligt horoskop: kärleken ses som ett medel för att få en bättre standard och kontakter högre upp i sällskapslivet.
Vid negativ påverkan: felaktiga värderingar och trångsynthet.
MÅNEN I SKYTTEN ( Derek & Julia Parker)
Ofta rastlös men vanligen optimistisk, glad och mycket god talare. I hög grad oberoende och frihetsälskande; det finns ofta tendens att vara något för nonchalant. Ett starkt behov av fysisk träning får vanligen sitt utlopp i sportdeltagande. Den intuitiva kraften är högt utvecklad och kan verka profetisk. Sorglöshet och ibland hänsynslöshet är negativa drag som bör motarbetas. Förändring av vistelseort är vanlig. Typisk är en viss impulsivitet och livlighet i rörelserna.
What is in a name? A rose by any other name would still smell as sweet...
Hittade en intressant artikel i aftonbladet idag. Ett par har döpt sin son till Adolf Hitler; och hans två syskon har även dem namn som syftar på nazism och nazismens historia. Nu fyllde lille Adolf 3 år och dem ville beställa en tårta med hans namn på; butiken vägrar blankt, och det tycker föräldrarna är orättvist mot deras barn. Att svastikor (kallas även hakkors av många) täcker alla yter av deras hus, och bil, tycker dem har med balans och frid att göra, och trots att dem är emot rasblandning så dementerar dem att dem är racister.
Okej, nu känner jag mig inspirerad att göra om min namnförslagslista lite. Varför inte döpa min dotter till Tvångskastrera Pedofiler? Och min son ska nog döpas till Ban Religions. Ska vi gå på mindre politiska namn och mer efter intresse kanske. Varför inte döpa dem efter mina favoritfilmer? Lilltjejen Dirty Dancing, pojken Gökboet och trillingbröderna Härskarringen, Två Tornen och Kungens Återkomst.
Sex är ju skoj också. Kanske ska de heta Peeenys, Vageena, Rompknoll, Thmisk, eller baisseksh. Det sista namnet är jag dock inte så engagerad i; det skulle mest vara för kuls skull. ;)
I Sverige är vi ju lite klämkäcka också, några namn jag funnit genom statistiska centralbyrån är Barbie, Bamse, Bullen, Tummelisa, alla Pippi Långstrumps namn finns med (alla!), en person heter Hitler i förnamn, Tussilago, Maskros, Anis, etc. Kan skratta och gråta hela dagen åt alla namn som finns.
http://www.scb.se/templates/Namnstatistik/NamnSokResultat____50725.asp
Looking forward to the future...
I've always been able to relate more to those older than me and I've never had a lot of friends my age. Unfortunately there is a lot more age discrimination than one might think. A 40+ person rarely look at me the same way they would at someone in their own age group; even after showing that I'm more mature, and smarter than most 25-year olds; and sometimes even 40+. If I were to fall for person over the age of 40, I would probably hear arguments such as: "You deserve to be with someone your own age", or "I'm too old for you", etc. But I bet you they won't be able to explain why.
Why should I look for my life partner in an age group I never got along with in the first place? What makes you too old (or me too young)? Have I not proved myself responsible, smart, mature? I don't want to party in clubs, or sleep around (anymore ;) ). All I want is a job that I like, a man that I love, a house and at least one child (but I want a big family).
In 4 months I will turn 25 years old. I've come a long way and I've done a lot of growing; especially the past 5 years. I've gone through hell and came out of it older and wiser. Unlike many people; I learn from my mistakes and also from other peoples' mistakes.
Losing the point here. :) I want to be there, on my 40th birthday, with children, husband, house, a few pets, and loving friends. I want a few wrinkles; it gives a person personality, it's a sign that they have been living, and most of all; it's human! That's why I find men (and women) in their late 30's, 40's, 50's, and sometimes even 60's, to be the most beautiful people.
I would love to photograph (if I was good at it) a very wrinkly old woman topless; tastefull of course, artsy, not pornographic! Just a big smile and lots of courage! What a beautiful piece of art that would be, and how inspiring for the future!
My opinion.
10 things every man should have... (in no specific order) *Not including manners and personality traits this time*
1. Nose- and ear hair trimmer. I like lots of hair, but I can do without it sticking out of nose and ear.
2. Deodorant. Sweat does Not make you smell manly.
3. Aftershave/Eau de toilette. Especially this one (Boss- Hugo Boss).
%20men.jpg)
4. Condoms. Women should keep some too, but it's everbody's responsibility, not one person's.
5. Hand soap. USE IT! After using the loo, after masturbating, when you wake up in the morning, before cooking/baking, after being down town. It's basic hygiene. You don't have to go wild; if you want germs and various deseases, be my guest, but don't give it to me!
6. Sheets, pillowcases, etc., and preferably more than one set.
7. A calender. Never forget your anniversary or wive's birthday again.
8. Iron. Creases lead to failure and death! ;)
9. Hover. There will come a day when your parents no longer clean your floors.
10. Curtains! It adds class to any home.
So, as I said; no particular order and some are more important than others. I'd say the top 6 things are essentials.
Utmaning!
Låt dem få veta att de har blivit utmanade genom att lämna en kommentar i deras blogg.Efter det så lämna en kommentar i detta inlägg så jag får se hur du har svarat.
J fö ja, N för Nej, O för Osäker.
[ J ] Du vet hur man kokar kaffe
[ J ] Du har barn
[ J ] Du använder dig av en kalender
[ N ] Du äger mer än ett kreditkort
[ O ] Du har kallat utlänningar för svartskallar mer än 5ggr
[ N ] Du äger mer än två datorer
[ N] Du äger en egen bil eller motorcykel
[ N ] Din plånbok är tom på kontanter just nu
[ N ] Du dricker alkohol minst 1 gång per vecka
[ O ] Du skulle aldrig kunna vara utan sex
[ N ] Du vet hur man byter olja i bilen
[ N ] Du har någon gång legat på sjukhus längre än 1 vecka
[ N ] Dina enda vänner är från din arbetsplats
[ J ] Du har varit på ett tupperwear party
[ N ] Du är överviktig enligt dig själv
[ N ] Dina vänner uppfattar dig som snål
[ J ] Du har spottat någon i ansiktet
[ J ] Kommer du ihåg alla du har haft sex med
[ J ] De flesta av dina vänner är äldre än du
[ J ] Du kan säga nej till att stanna uppe hela natten
[ J ] Du alltid tvättar dina egna kläder
[ N ] Du röstar
[ J ] Har du läst Kissies blogg någon gång?
[ N ] Du har glömt din mammas födelsedag minst en gång
[ J ] Du gillar att gå ut och gå själv
[ N ] Du gillar ordet FITTA
[ J ] Du har tittat på pratshower
[ J ] Du dricker kaffe minst en gång om dagen
[ J ] Du vet hur man diskar
[ O ] Du älskar Blondinbellas blogg
[ N ] Du vill göra något förbjudet
[ O ] Du har haft sex på första dejten.
[ J ] Du kan räkna till 10 på något annat språk
[ J ] När du säger att du ska göra något så gör du det bara ibland
[ N ] Du är smartare än dina syskon
[ N ] Du kan klippa gräset
[ J ] Du kan simma
[ J ] Du kan mer än två språk flytande
[ O ] Du kommer ihåg att vattna blommorna
[ J ] Du pluggar när du måste
[ J ] Älskar Pizza
[ N ] Du tränar regelbundet
[ N ] Människorna på Starbucks vet vem du är
[ O ] Din favoritmat är hämtmat och restaurang
[ N ] Gillar du ordet KUK
[ O ] Det första du gör på morgonen är att få i dig koffein
[ O ] Du kan gå och handla utan att köpa något du inte behöver
[ J ] Du kan laga mat själv
[ N ] Du tycker att politik är intressant
[ J ] Du gillar vin
[ O ] Du kommer till skolan/jobbet tidigt varje dag
[ N] Du har alltid en penna på dig
[ N ] Du har fått kvarsittning i skolan
[ J ] Är det romantiskt med vin
[ O ] Du har en mobiltelefon som kostar mer än 5000 kr
[ N ] Du förstår politiska skämt första gången de sägs
[ J ] Du kan skriva snabbt
[ N] Du har förstått att vädret ändras för varje timme
[ J ] Du använder internet varje dag
[ N ] Du har skönhetsopererat dig
[ J ] Du behöver rensa din garderob
[ N ] Du vill ha en Sodastream i julklapp
[ J ] Du kan läsa en bok och faktiskt avsluta den.
Jag utmanar Eva, Susanne och Emelie.
Lalalaaaaa...
I'm drinking red wine and watching the season 2 audio commentary for Black Books. I'm not a big fan of red wine; mostly because I believe it's Satan's piss. White wine is fine; it makes me deep and I say meaninful stuff. When I drink red wine (I just wrote 'whine') I go off on a randomness trip. I can only think of these meaningless things, and then I share them with people. Like; have you ever noticed how whip cream (the one on a bottle) has this hollow after taste; it makes your mouth feel bigger.
If I had been drinking white wine I'd be saying things like: "It's such a shame I don't know polish..." or "I was such a lovely child! Why doesn't anybody loooove me?". But now, I don't. I did however cry after watching the last epiosde of Anne from green gables (the prologue/epilogue series in 3 parts). I have now downloaded the original series, which is one year younger than me.
I will be 25 years old this year! My brother will be 30! Czeslaw Niemen, a polish musical icon and my mother's friend in the late 60's- early 70's would have turned 70 this year. He died 5 years ago this year.
Anyway. Red wine= satan's piss. Justsoyouknow. Bloody great wine otherwise. Easy to drink. It's called... Candidato. I reccomend it.
Otherwise I had a brilliant christmas eve and an even better new years eve! New Years is the most important holiday of the year, for me. I don't know what it is, but it feels more special than anything else. I don't know when was the last time I had such a lovely time.
... and I got laid. ;)
A B C D D...
It's grey, wet and quite cold outside today so I think we all need something to cheer us up. http://atdehydi.blogg.se/2008/november/idag-blir-det-bara-humor.html
Beautiful baby, stupid demonstrants!
On December 2nd my beautiful and smart niece Tturned 1 years old, and yesterday (6 Dec) we had a party for her at her maternal grandparents house less than an hour from here. She was so adorable! At one point my mother started tickling her like mad, and she was choking with laughter. I got some perfect pictures!
My gift was a wooden turtoise with funny moving legs; unfortunately it didn't come with a string, like I thought it did, so we tied a string from one of the gift wrappings 'round its neck. It worked, she walked around with it, pulling the string-- well, for about 2 minutes untill something else caught her interest.
I wouldn't say my attention span is like a 1 year old; that would be extreme; but 8-10 year old.... surely, that's quite mild when you suffer from a neurological disease?
I have to tell you; I sent three job applications; one was somewhere close to Bournemouth/Poole (I've lived in Bournemouth so that would be perfect), one in the Cotswolds, and one in the London area. It's all live-in, waiting mostly, in hotels. Maybe I'll hate it, but I won't know 'till I try it, right?
Me: What's the worst that could happen?
Dad: They might want you to perform other types of services....
Me: No, the worst that could happen is that I force Them to perform those types of services...
Not to me!! No, I'd pimp them out! I'd tell them that in Sweden you can make LOADS of money on selling sex (especially men, if most of the staff is male) and I would ONLY take 40 %. Crossing fingers they haven't heard of human trafficking.
Sweden is strange. It's legal to Sell sex, but not to Buy. That protects prostitutes from ending up in jail (which tax payers would have to pay for), but due to the criminalisation of the purchase, the risk of falling victim to a violent customer increases. Legalize prostitution, like they have in the Netherlands, and the violence, human trafficking, etc. would decrease. The workers would get the same benefits as any other employee, including maternal and sick leave. Let's stop victimizing women and denying their sexuality. Some women (and men!) do it because they like it, others neither like it, nor dislike it, and do it for the quick cash. In a country where prostitution was legal there would be authorized agencies, and they would interview potential employees, like any other job, and be very alert to any mental instability, care for their employee's health, and make them take tests for STDs.
In my utopia nobody would need to pay for sex, or drugs, etc. but Utopia is a book based on Sir Thomas More's definition of an ideal society and not the way reality is today. So, in this real world we have today, I want to add that I also think drugs should be legal. It's all about control. In Holland they have centers where people can go to test their drugs to make sure it's not "bad stuff". This (legalizing prostitution and selling/posessing drugs) also makes it less of a tabboo and that would stop most of the people who would otherwise try it to rebell, or because they want the excitment of doing something wrong.
I read today that a lot of people are complaining about the annual nazi and anti-nazi demonstrations in Salem (outside Stockholm, I think). I think it's wonderful that Everyone gets their say; most of the time Sweden allow their citiziens the freedom of speech they have the right to. However, every year these demonstrations take place there is loads of violence and people living in the city stay inside for fear of being assaulted. If they can not have these demonstrations without causing havoc then I don't think they should be allowed to have them. It's no longer got anything to do with freedom of speech; it's about protecting the people of Salem from serious injuries and possibly death. The pro- and anti demonstrations should be put on seperate days, but if they, after all these years, can't demonstrate their cause without violence, then they shouldn't be allowed to have it.
This entry became really serious. :)
I started off talking about my niece.
Accountants suffering from diabetis
-You should go to a diabetic.
-Why?
-To advice you on what to eat.
-You mean dietitian!
(Hilarity ensued)
My joints hurt; maybe the bloke with arthritis next door can help me?
In other news; I'm sitting here with a finger in my ear. It's not a hobby of mine, it just hurts.
I turned down pizza tonight; I have no craving what so ever for junk food. Gross! Why do we like it so much? Surely a meal made from scratch at home tastes a million times better and keeps you from getting hungry right away. Were we brought up to assosciate junk with reward and celebration, so now when we eat it we feel rewarded.
I have applied to three jobs now; one close to Bournemouth, one in the Cotswolds and the third one... in the London area, I think. They all offer accomodation. Hopefully I'll be back in England before march. Crossing fingers over here!
What do accountants do when they're constipated?
- They work it out with a pencil!
*roaring laughter*
That joke gives me the most hilarious images in my head; boring accountants, suite and tie, in the office bathroom, picking their bottom with a pencil. Oh dear, oh dear. *wiping tears*
Mmmmm.
Just been to the shop; bought lactaid milk, "Julmust", gingerbread cookies and fags. Gingerbread cookies is the only thing I've eaten today, because they get really soft in your mouth and are easier to swallow. I wanted orange flavoured gb cookies, but they didn't have it. Freaks!!
Now I'm going to enjoy my cookies and this wonderfull glass of milk and no one can stop me. :) Mmm, tastes like childhood.
Owwy.
Typical. I ran out of smokes yesterday and thought I'd buy more today, but now my throat might be forcing me to quit. We'll see what happens once my throat is better. I just took a panodil (advil) so I think it will feel better soon; at least enough so that I can eat.
22-11-2008
Highest. perfectionist. the next thirty years. immensely rich. comptroller.
I don't want to make entries with only pictures when it's taken so long for me to write something proper. Well, define proper.
I've been a good girl this week. Well, the past two days at least, but that counts, does it not? I stayed over at my mom's thur-fri and on friday I hovered the entire flat. In the evening I went back to dad's relatively early, and even though I got to bed late I still got out of bed (sofa?) at 10:30 and didn't snooze at all. I got ready, had a cup of coffee and a danish and got on the bus into town. Bought what I was supposed to and was at my mom's place before 2 pm. I cleaned her windows and then we had a nice dinner of chicken and veggie wook. Now I'm watching Nevermind the buzzcocks season 5 and drinking wine. I have become such a light weight.
This week's advice, and this week it's directed at certain gender:
Men, do not twiddle and woman's nips; it might work on the radio, but women do not like it. It hurts! Next time a man tries to get radio channel 4 through by twisting my nipples I will strangle them with a cable and bury them in their own backyard. Just saying...
This week's picture.
I made this manip quite a few years ago when the Lord of the rings films were still TEH SHIT! I think I made a good choice. Maybe Sean (fucking prude) and Bill should switch places, but other than that I'm pleased with the result. :)
Oh Gawd, blah.
<- Another tattoo I will eventually get. Love it!
Second (included folders inside other folders. I'm a neatfreak when it comes to organizing files on my computer. Off the computer however, I'm really not...)
Made this animation many years ago, probably as an icon for my livejournal. There are several versions of it. One just says "Writer's block?" and one "...?"
Room 101
1. Blinking lights at concerts and on tv
You try to get comfy on the sofa to watch the telly and suddenly some genious decide that blinking lights are still cool, giving me and plenty other epileptics a nice motion sickness. Cutting from one picture to another really quickly has the same effect as blinking lights. I'm not overly sensitive to blinking lights as some epileptics, but it does affect me.
2. Crocs
They are Ugly, uncomfortable and make my feet look huge.
3. Men who shave or wax their body
Hairy men are extremely sexy, and touching a hairless man makes me feel like a pedophile.
4. People who take themselves and life too seriously.
It's just life, it's no big deal!!
5. Myself
Sometimes I just get so sick and tired of hearing my own voice, and I can be a real nuisance. Besides, if I'm put in room 101, I can bring back the 80's. As much as I love Bill Bailey, he should be punished for putting the 80's into room 101.
The tea and coffee making facility left a lot to be desired.
There are, however, a few points that I do agree with, but one especially.
35. You watch an English/American film and get upset that all swedes are called Inga,Ingrid or Sven when you know these are not common names in Sweden.
These names are for grandmothers and grandfathers Only! And the name 'Heidi' has never, in Any generation, been common in Sweden. If you believe swedes are named Heidi, then you are confusing us with Switzerland and will have to face the consequences of your ignorance! Thou shalt burn in purgatory! :)
Some of the points on the list made you 'a person living in Sweden' rather than swedish though; it's difficult controlling the rules in the country you reside in. Maybe I just haven't tried hard enough? Maybe I should try to change the law a bit; make some additions perhaps.
My suggestions, categorized by the punishment they will recieve, if not abiding by these laws.
Fines
£3m. in fine if you dye your hair blonde
Torture
Feet cut off if you are wearing crocs (they will then be fed to... the crocs)
Death penalty
Men who shave/wax (trimming beard is okay) will be beheaded
Anyone who air reality tv shows will be stoned in public
Anyone who is a member of a boy- or girlband will be shot by Simon Amstell
People who confuse Sweden with Switzerland will get a one-way ticket to the electric chair
I'll probably add to it, but that's it for now. Time to work!
Made this....
My name is Alan Jones, I like to pick my nose, I like to pick my nose, I do, I like to pick my bum, especially with my thumb.
Why did the cannibal eat his neighbour?
-She gave him the finger!
mwahahaha!
In other news; today a dog sniffed my butt on the bus. Should I be flattered or offended? I feel so torn! ;)
I also encountered a typically swedish situation at the store; a man commented on the price of the product he was buying... it was too cheap! I had to wait in line for 20 minutes while the poor teller corrected her mistake. MY GOD!
Today's quote is the sound of silence... :)
I love this bit from Nevermind the buzzcocks:
Mark: I'm glad to see you're taking notes, Bill.
Bill: I just like to be apposite of the facts.
Mark: No you don't! You like to say cheese and weasels and go "urrh" *shakes head*
Bill: Or cheesels, as I like to call them. A weasely snack with a cheese finish.
and...
Russell Howard: I'd record Sandra the witch, watch the adventures of S club 8 and finish off with Thundercats.
Phil Jupiter: When u say finish off...
Russell: Nooooooooooooo!
I'd save the good stuff for Cheetarah, who wouldn't? She was a cheetah, but sort of a lady. Doing that and writing boobless on your calculator; great days.
Bill: Saving your scabs in a little matchbox. Posting them to your penpal.
Russell: Posting them to your penpal? "Dear Günther, thought you'd enjoy these"
Bill: Ici, mon scabs.
Russell: (drawling french accent) "Dear Bill, thank you for your scabs; next time a pube or two. Yours, Renevoir! Mmmmm!"
Bill: Cher Renevoir, I am terminating this correspondance, it has gone a bit weird.
(subject is also a quote from NmtB)
Creative genious!
I drew this one, initially to see if the cherry blossoms would work with the masks, but ended up liking the result. This will be my first tattoo. Proscaenium is latin for "on stage" and Postscaenium means "behind the stage/off stage".
I found another tattoo of an autumn leaf that I thought was really beautiful, but I thought I'd try and do it myself since the first one turned out well. This is the earlier version. 
And here's the final version. I'm quite pleased. I haven't done a lot on photoshop before; well I have, but not with this result. I like it!
Oy vey!
Lookit, new blog! Yay!
WARNING!
This blog will contain traces of nut.
I want to take the oportunity to thank some very special individuals: the stupid people!
Without you comedy wouldn't be the same, and my life would be lacking of purpose; my heart would be empty and beat for nothing but to only just keep me alive.
I wish you knew who you were, but unfortunately (or fortunately; depends on how you look at it) you are too stupid to realize that I'm talking about you. Nonetheless, thank you for making me laugh every time you open your mouths, and every time you do something that proves, yet again, what a tosspot you really are. Thank you!
Now, I'm going to enjoy this glass of wine standing on the table calling my name, and watch the most recent episode of Nevermind the Buzzcocks. Cheerio mingers!
